Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the redneck so racist? Because he had a severe dislike for the black community.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Sex vagina. lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I like to thumb up my own jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's 2+2? Fish

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench Men enjoying a day in the park

thumb_up thumb_down -10

can you pass the soap?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how did the man with the gun die? obesity

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

oh hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops