Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you end a sentence

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops