How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

Wenis Penis

What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He simply lost grip of the cone and it fell out of his hand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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