Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the dad stop working on the roof he fell off

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Are you going to just stand there and watch me burn for i am on fire? Well that is fine because the sensation feels so fantastic. You are going to just stand there and listen to me whine the night away. It is quite okie-dokie for I really love your art of lying! To be certain, I love it very much! I can not find myself telling you what really occurred, I can only explain to you the sensation i felt from this moment. For I have a dagger in my trachea. For the number of days where the do not's fell like the actually do's. I will be very happy :). But where are you trying to walk away from. Than she told me she was leaving. I said no you very certainly are not! Megan Lady-who-sleeps-with-many-men (aka Whore) Fox. We find ourselves back on the day we met...... etc etc, lot's of pissed off Rapper vs. the English language. Than more words fly out of the mouth of the woman that said she "just wanted a hit" than got slapped around the ear by her ex. It is a pointless song. Today's youth is hopeless. (just kidding i love Eminem stay infinite for life)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's your guys names?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops