What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

Dumbledore dies.

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

do you have a wife?

Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

whats my name? Matt

How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Kevin. Which? Kevin Smith or Kevin Johnson? Kevin Johnson. Oh ok, come in please.

Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

Life gave me limes. Now how am I suppose to make lemonade

What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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