Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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nick ya honkin of b.o m8

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What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

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Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

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What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 24

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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Womens rights.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

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Roses are red violets are blue, I have no pickup line, just Get your tits out

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Justin

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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