What does two plus two equal? 4

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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once you go black your credit goes wack

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There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

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Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

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person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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