Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

Obama

What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Q: why did everyone on the ship drown? A: Because the ship sunk

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

What's red and bad for you teeth. A brick

What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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