What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

How Long is a Chinese name.

Gale swallows.

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

womens sports...

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

Wumbo

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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