*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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hi

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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