"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

why wont me daughter eat my feces

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

Q: What happened when Sophie broke her leg? A: She was taken to hospital where she was given a cast, and made a full recovery just in time for the Summer.

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

what smells like tuna? my underwear

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A broken boomerang

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

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I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

yo momma so fat that she needs to lose weight

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? everything! dead monkeys are awesome

my dick is like a bridge. i dont know why.

What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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