Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

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What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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what happens when you throw a rock in the water? it gets wet

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops