Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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