Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

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Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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What the hell are you doing?

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

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Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

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The adventures of Helen Keller:

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Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

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How do you approach a hot guy in the library? Very quietly.

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What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

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Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

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Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

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I named my son ps2 controller

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Your mom went to college

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

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A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

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Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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