What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

What do you call a blond reading a book? A blond reading a book.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

hello juliano and guss. having fun?

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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