whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

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Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

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what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

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Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops