What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

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what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

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I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, it is impossible for something to be red all over if there is black and white also.

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Q: How did the black man cross the Atlantic? A: He flew with an airliner, a large fixed-wing aircraft for transporting passengers and cargo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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