A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his Martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go f*** herself."

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...