Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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1134

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops