What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? A one-way ticket to Hell for messing with God's creations, you heathen!

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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What did the black guy who was lost in Syria say? "Where am I?"

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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I haven't left my basement in 29 years

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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Knock, Knock! Go away!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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