Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Whats 9+10? 19

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

Knock knock

pedophile

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...