Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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lebron

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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women's rights

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

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FIRE!!

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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