Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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