To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...