Q: Why is the sky green? A: It's not

Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

whats red and all over the road your family after a horrific car crash

Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

A small black boy was walking down the street. He ran into a police officer and the police officer shot him, why? A: Because the officer was racist.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What do you do when a red gorilla comes running at you with 7 dominoes in his hand Ask him to stop

What do you call a scottish drunk? a taxi

a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

96

Sittin' on the couch with the morning post With a cold cup of coffee and some boring toast Thinkin' I'm-a change it up, yeah that's always fun What you reckon, Remz? A McDonald's run So we hit the couch cushions, need some dollars, friend Yo, I found a five. Man, that's Canadian. How 'bout a loonie? A twonie? A spoon or The Goonies? Oh, it's 10:25. Dude, you gotta move, G. Got the cash, got the car, got the pedal to the floor Speed limit's 25, but I'm doing 34 Going drive-thru style, man it's fast express You can call it trans fat, I call it happiness Roll up to the teller fella with a minute to spare Frenchy with a headset, "can I take your order?" A McGriddle with a little sweet and sour there, son A McMuffin, then be stuffin' muffins up in my trunk Then a tray or two of hotcakes, man I can't decide, uh... All's I know is hit them things with Aunt Jemimah How 'bout an egg fajita for some Texas flavor No drama but my momma wants a breakfast bagel Don't forget my #4, or there'll be hell to spend And I want them eggs poached like an elephant Frenchy back on the line, "is that all your order?" No it ain't, fool, I want a Coca-Cola! Get my cup of Coke and I'm-a start a riot Cuz on the cup lid, dude depressed the "diet" Check his shirt tag, and I catch the name Brian, I ain't tryin' to drink aspartame Sittin' on the couch, 'bout an hour later Pickin' at a pouch of some Now n' Laters Hardly starving, man, but I find a hunch Start the car up fast because it's time for lunch It just takes two bucks and I get what I need Two beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese "Supersize Me" said he's had enough of it But how is it bad for my heart if I'm in love with it? If you never had McDonald's, heck, well dude you should It's a party, like a Hardee's, except the food is good Just don't get a large #2, I plead with you friend Cuz it'll be a large #2 when you see it again Enter the store, first you holla, then you Pick a couple items off the dollar menu Four hot McNuggets, dessert with custard Mix the sweet n' sour with a squirt of mustard. A Big Mac attack, you can max the lettuce Paying ain't a pain, they take cash or credit Want a water? You can pay up there for spring Or get the free Grimace cup--how embarassing They say, "you're playing with a cardiac arrest, my boy" Only thing bad for my heart's when they forget my toy Now I'm-a have a milkshake, but before you rant It's made of shamrocks--now that's a plant People say it's bad, but I don't believe them McDonald's is peace--just ask Tom Friedman Momma catch me with a 'zine, and she's screaming "stop! Don't you worry, Mom, it's just my man Ray Kroc

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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