Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Why did the blind man have a poo Because he needed one.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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the sky is green no it is not

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drugs.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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Whats worse than finding an worm in your apple? 1942 BERLIN

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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