What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

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A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

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how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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why did the T-Rex eat the other dinosaur? Because it is a carnivorous animal.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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You might be a redneck if you have red on your neck

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

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Cinema summer shits coming this year! Reboot edition ONE! Rocky BarBoler a older man with dreams of becoming a true boxing champion!... but will he succeed against the champion Apollo thirteen? Watch ROCKY To find out. Starring Mike Tyson as Rocky, and Justin Bieber as Apollo thirteen (Do I need remind you Rocky lost in his first movie?, Well that one is for you "Beleibers" because in the end you are misguided cuties.. most way to young for me, but you are as cute as you are silly). Moral: Loves cute girls... especially those over 16... legal age here... good luck calling us all pedophiles... They mature fast here, "beliebe" me, twelve year olds have fully grown boobs... what did you think I meant by cute? RAWR! Look but no touch is a okay for me mama Luigi. I just tend to call me once they turn 16...

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EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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