How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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what's up? my penis.

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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