Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

why am I writing this...im bored

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

how do you boil oil? add b to oil

What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

your mom is so stupid she got raped

What did the man order at KFC, in Miami? A face.

fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...