whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

thumb_up thumb_down +8

there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

silly rabbit trix are for kids and jews

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

thumb_up thumb_down +8

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two penguins are sitting in the bathtub, the first one says to the second one "pass the soap." The other penguin says," what do I look like a radio?"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops