What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

A woman wears a dress.

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he suffered severe blood loss and is most likely dead.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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