What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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what the hell happened to your face

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Dick Chaney

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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