2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

i was molested.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

Good to see you today!

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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