Why don't Black people Dream? Because the last one that did got shot.

Katy Perry

How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

How do you send Harry Potter a post card? Get an owl to send it to his house.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

Why was the black man kicked out of the restaurant? Blatant racism was still very prevalent at that time and place.

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

why cant fat people walk because they are fat

How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane from Mexico City to Los Angeles? A pilot you racist.

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

Dusters blow stuff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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