Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

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Swag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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