I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

i said wut wut in the butt!

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

56

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

Yee

teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

A BABY seal walks into a club

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...