Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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Why did the black man get kicked out of his hotel room? He did't pay and was in debt so they couldn't allow him to stay.

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

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Pants and God shorts: God: Jews ur my people nao! Jews: Yay we are Gods chosen people! Riches and gRape awaits us! World domination next! God: Well, not quite what I meant but, err... Close enough? Jews: YAY! Moral: So much for "the chosen ones" :(

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old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers

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Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

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Matthew Wyckoff

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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