a horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks why the long face? the horse, incapable of understanding any human dialect, promptly shits on the floor and leaves

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

What's the difference between a black guy and a bucket of chicken? A lot.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

How do you judge a black person? By the content of their character.

lol i'm going to hell for laughing at this shit

Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

What's worse then your pets death? I don't know I asked you.

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

Black people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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