man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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How do you make a clown sad? Brutally murder his children.

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Breaking news! An 18 wheeler has gone loose and hit a playground damaging a swing, 1 fatality and 16 children injured 5 in critical condition

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Why did Tiarnan not ride is bike to school today. Tiarnan's dead.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas?? -nothing, he didn't make it that far

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What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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why couldn't the man open the window? he had no hands due to his time serving the USA in vietnam

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD COPENHAGEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Women's rights...

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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How will Jesse die? His mom doesnt have any food left (or money) so she eats him, and then jesse's fat little brother farts on his obese corpse

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a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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