Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's black, brown and red? My dog as a serial killer

thumb_up thumb_down -20

New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats wosre than stubbing your toe? being lost on a desert island being raped

thumb_up thumb_down -20

GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than breaking your neck on a trampoline? Getting in a car crash on the way to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

thumb_up thumb_down -22

casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If Life Throws You Melons, Then You're Probably Dyslexic. -S.H.A.T Brother 2Flush

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops