What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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whats it called when you see a ton of white people running down a hill.... an avalanch whats it called when you see a ton of black people running down a hill.....a mud slide whats it called when you see a ton of mexicans running down a hill............ a jail break

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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