How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

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What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

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"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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Albert <3 Hunter

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

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Joesph Triphook.

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A police officer walks into a doughnut shop. He approaches the cashier and hands him 20$. He says "Here, I saw you drop this on your way in" he promptly leaves the store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops