Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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a Jew had a small nose

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops