how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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Does pizza sound good for dinner?

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

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What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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