Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

Your mom is so...wonderful.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

America Votes

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

WOMENS RIGHTS

you know what they say... hydrate or die

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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