what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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nick toth

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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