A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi would you be interested in learning about Scientology? No

What's beneath Chuck Norris's beard? A chin I presume, as that is what most humans have under their beards. Chuck Norris is a human and therefore is likely to have a chin. This is all based on the assumption that he is a human, because of the many characteristics he has shown that are humanlike.

Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

ur an fagit

Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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