What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

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What's wrong with Barney? He's big and purple.

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VAL SUCKS

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? You. You who? You should be drug out into the street and shot. Whoever you are, I will find you.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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Why do gingers have red hair? Its genetically encoded in their DNA

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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yada yada

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

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Why do British Folk have yellow teeth? Genetics. Although scientists don't know the exact cause, it has been shown that people of British ancestory have a genetic predisposition which inhibits the body's breakdown and utilization of Vitamin C and Calcium. This causes decalcification and scorbutic gums. The British slang term "Limey" comes from the fact that the British Royal Navy was made to drink lime juice to prevent scury. The Royal Navy was almost wiped out by an epidemic of Scurvy.

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Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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