Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

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Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

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Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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What can fly? Lots of things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

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Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

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Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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