Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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