what happened to the guy that got attacked by a shark he died

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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Q: knock knock who is there A;dunno go check

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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What do andy and Justin Bieber have in common? they are both 5'7

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

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What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Which is longer? A rope...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops